Why Can't We Be Friends? (Memphis)

[❦Mufasa❦]

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[atrb=background,http://i899.photobucket.com/albums/ac192/fireb4ashes/Lilitu---MIDDLE.png] It was all too much. A low growl ripped from the black femme's throat as she stalked into Hell's Cavern, her eyes flaming with anger and pent-up emotions from over the years. She was bad at letting them up, and she usually just covered them up with her pissy attitude and a bad glare. What she really needed was somebody to love...but she did not know if she could still hold that emotion. So for now, a friend. She flopped down on the soft grasses deep in most beautiful area of Lucifer's that she had discovered, a heavy breath blowing out from deep in her chest. Her head pounded from the amounts of things she was keeping back. It was taking all she had not to go out on a rampage, to kill things and just leave the animal's dead carcasses laying on the ground, staining and overflowing the soil with blood of wasted lives. Vile, cruel, thoughts that were disparaging to her character. Truthfully, she would not do that if it were not such a bad time for her. And so she said, and so she waited for anyone to come to listen to her pleas. She did not want to go insane, that was the last thing she wanted, she was just not...very nice. That was all, it was the way she was raised, the way that she was made to be. 'Who am I kidding? I am just leading myself here for disappointment. No one will come. Nobody cares about the bitchy wolf who does not know how to hold up a relationship of any kind, friendship or otherwise.' Thoroughly finished with her put downs of herself, she just sat there, the occasional sigh bursting from her lungs. How different she looked from the normal. And though she wanted someone to find her, she prayed no one would. She could not risk letting her own image be demolished beneath the insecure little pup she still was inside.

[¡§LUNAR✮OASIS¡§&#]

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The skies had found them self in a slow day. The clouds above had kept the sun in its hiding place most of the day. Now the end of the day, the sky showed itself at last. A smirk of darkened red hues. The Lucifer lands were famous for their gray or rather darkened skies. Due to the mountain and waters edge placing. To the maned alphess, she rather enjoyed the feeling. Besides, the sun just made everything worse. Having to squint from the brightness and a ray of heat would hover above you.

War was on the edge of breaking forth over the island. Like a plague that would spread and even kill many. It was something to look forward for in Memphis' mind. Yet it was also something that would be hard and dwelling for others. She was always ready for battle, in her eyes, even in her sleep. This would be a battle that would be spoken of for centuries. The Cesaru happenings seem like yesterday.

Yet Memphis didn't have her glory in that battle. This one would be a different story. The enemy was far greater, and all packs were involved. Dragunov had brought the plague to Traum. Infecting so many, bringing so many to their death and some to thinking they were above all else. Lucifer's, Renegade and Enchanted all working together with Serena's calling. The majestic demoness that all of Traum would forever respect.

The deep and lovely thoughts of war rejected from Memphis' mind. The maned wolf had grown reckless from the caverns and went for a glance of the area. It was something that most Leaders of packs felt the need to do so every now and again. For a split second the scent of a member she was unfamiliar with filled her nostrils. It seemed many wolves had been finding themselves packs quickly before the war breakout. For that reason Memphis was on her toes back and forth accepting members, she had missed some new members it appeared.

Her appearence discribed Lilitu, and within the high ranks of the Lucifers she was a ruthless wolf at that. Memphis knew very well not to anger her. In fact Lilitu was something like Memphis. A demoness that seemed so lost perhaps? Things truly have changed around for Memphis though. So much positivity and family life kept her on her feet, away from the madness.

The grass grew soft, Memphis kept a safe distance. Her side exposed to the unknown family member. Lifting her head to the side, as if examining with interest. She appeared to be enjoying the grass' comfort. "I've heard many things about you, Lilitu. It's about time we finally met." Her voice was welcoming yet had a dangerous edge to them. Keeping a slight dominate aura with her. This would be interesting for sure.

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[❦Mufasa❦]

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[atrb=background,http://i899.photobucket.com/albums/ac192/fireb4ashes/Lilitu---MIDDLE.png] No noises echoed amongst the cavern, it seemed she was all alone here. Or was she? The whispers of evil spirits danced about in her mind. Perhaps she really was going crazy. A low growl, with hints of a whimper escaped from her maw, and ragged claws dragged down her foreleg leaving bloody crevasses in their path. She squeezed her eyes shut tight, then blinked quickly as if to shoo some sort of mental delusion away. She never expected anyone to give a damn. She never would have thought that Memphis would have stopped to speak to her. Just step in and leave, perhaps. A fleeting nod or a meeting of the eyes to acknowledge her presence, expected to be returned with a respectful greeting. That was the problem with a pack, too much social hierarchy for her to handle. It was all different back home, back where she knew she belonged but could never return because of the ghosts that inhabited the battle fields. Because of the nightmares that would never leave the front of her mind if she returned, even for a short while. Her ears twitched back and forth, the only noises her own huffy breathing. The green grass soft beneath her pelt, her eyes drifted closed, maybe to enjoy the moment. Maybe because she was falling asleep? Her eyes snapped open, no. Sleep was not an option, she would not succumb to the deadly blackness of that void so many know as sleep. It was much too dangerous, yes, much too dangerous. It would lead to bad, terrible things. Things she did not want to re-live, things she did not want to remember. But would she ever admit to these nightmares? She doubted so. There was a reason why she stayed away from the dens at night. Suddenly, a scent wafted down into the cave, and it was one she recognized. She had never spoken to the wolf it belonged to, but it was all over the land. It was Memphis, her Alphess. She knew all too well who Memphis was. She was not one to be meddled with, after all, was it not her who had removed Solokov's ear? And for that she admired her more than anyone she had ever met. Even after the horrid stories she had heard of the happenings of that time, she still scarred him forever. And then, she found happiness. Lilitu was too weak for that. Sure, she was physically strong, but her emotional strength was close to none. Lilitu did not move, however, even though she knew it was probably disrespectful, she just had no...inspiration, perhaps. She did not know what to say, or how to act. Just a dumb pup at heart bumbling about life as one does about the den the first time they open their eyes. "I've heard many things about you, Lilitu. It's about time we finally met." That voice, smooth, but dangerous. The voice of someone who would rip you to shreds if you anger her enough. She rose slowly, turning to face the Alphess, then, instead of lunging as many would expect her to do in a emotional rage such as this, she bowed, her muzzle resting against her elongated foreleg, still bloody and bleeding from the injuries she had inflicted upon herself. "My lady, it is a pleasure to finally meet you." Her voice had a nice quality to it, but still shook slightly, and the angry, demon-tormented look in her eyes was still present if you looked hard enough to slip behind her mask.

[¡§LUNAR✮OASIS¡§&#]

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There was a edgy scent of blood in the area. The smell of another wolf at that. While Memphis didn't care if she was rolling around enjoying herself in privacy. She had stumbled in at a wrong time perhaps. Even Memphis knew she didn't want others to see when she held the soft spots. But it was that small string of sanity that had to keep us attached to the earth.

While Arden and Kirill seemed to bring all the happiness she needed to her. Memphis had been slowly walking the path of change. Once living a life of hatred and distaste for nearly all wolf kind. Finding the Lucifers, making it her home had really changed things. Her beloved mate, her son like her own. Had kept her on the righteous path, but that didn't mean the Lucifer demon was dwelling with in her.

No in fact that demon stood strong within her. Like a robot in her times of needs. Her own chakra as a wolf, strengthening her power of rage and willingness. Just the small thought of Dragunov or an Order wolf set her on the edge. Her talons would elongate and she would often lash out on something near to her. A temper that couldn't be well hidden even.

"My lady, it is a pleasure to finally meet you."

Lilitu had bowed before Memphis. Like a power drunk queen that even she enjoyed, she smirked at the respect. It was funny, considering Memphis had once come from a pack that had monarchy within it. But the Lucifers would forever be a family, not something you bounded yourself to. "Raise your head, Lilitu." A friendly gesture, in the least.

Long black legs bounded over the devils land. Taking what may seem like dangerous steps closer. Yet simply Memphis was literally trying to be friendly in a ... creepy way. "Tell me Lilitu, what about the Lucifers attracted you?" She smiled. It would be interesting to hear an answer. Most wanted a refuge, a family somewhere safe to keep their demonic aura's safe.

For Memphis she had come across Kirill, the two of them had become one of the most deadliest pair of bad asses around Traum. Taking care of things in their own hands, it was soon Kirill and Memphis decided that wanted to take control of their family pack lands. Considering Lucifers had originally been Kirill's it was a no-brainer he would regain his position. While Memphis fought well against her -now- friend Vivian. Strange how it all worked out.

You have to fight for everything you want. You truly have to want something to get it. Simple words of wisdom in Memphis' mind. The skies above them shifted with clouds of gray. Leaving the area with a strong feeling of nostalgia. These lands would forever be her home, her own refuge. Already reaching the age of four years, she still felt the need to conquer among Traum by Kirill's side.

ooc; that post was just... a whole lotta muse but not too interesting sorry haha.

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[❦Mufasa❦]

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[atrb=background,http://i899.photobucket.com/albums/ac192/fireb4ashes/Lilitu---MIDDLE.png] "Raise your head, Lilitu." The queen's voice echoed through the caverns like a whisper on the wind. And just then, she felt a cold wave pass over her body, a shiver coursing over her pelt and the muscle that lay beneath it as her head slowly ascended to its normal height to look at the maned wolf in all of her... That thought cut off, she really had no way to accurately describe Memphis, as she had only heard stories. It was wrong to judge someone so fully, that one could create one word to describe them, before even knowing them. It led to misunderstanding, and war. The entirety of Traum was on the verge of war, and yes, she acted bloodthirsty, and she could be, most certainly, when an antagonist threatened those she loved, but in truth...she feared arguing, fighting, battling, more than anything. It was not the fact that death loomed ominously around the corner, outstretching its hand, sheathed in black, waiting for you to follow it along, like some trained house pup coming inside from its afternoon play. It was because she could lose something, two somethings, really, that were even more dear to her. She could lose the family that she had become so accustomed to calling her own. And she could lose herself. Losing ones self in the blood and turmoil of a battle was something she had seen all too often at home. She had to become ruthless, cold-hearted and sadistic just to keep her sanity locked away in the walls of her mind, desperately trying to cling to the tresses of it before it just simply slipped away, a petal blown from a rose upon the grass. But that grass would not stop it from falling to the bottomless pits of the hell that one could only too accurately describe as insanity once they have seen it enough. Watching brethren, and sisters alike lose themselves to the terrors that they have seen from living in such a war-torn land like her birthplace was torture in and of itself. She had no idea how she had survived. But she had been a sheltered pup, growing up as the only one to survive in the litter, the rest stillborn or dying a year at the most later. Her parents took care of the only remaining heiress like they would an Ancient Grecian vase, dug up from the ruins of a home, discovered on a dig. They had not let her out into the real world, not even during her training, and after the battle ended, her mind closed back up into its original bubble of 'I know nothing, I see nothing, nothing is amiss' as she had been taught to do by her parents. It was a foolish decision for them to make, but it was one that had to have been taken, she supposed. She could see their reason why, but that did not mean that she appreciated what they did, nor that she wanted to ever slip back into that bubble again. Even though it caused her worlds of pain that she had never expected, after she had shed that mask during the final battle, she knew that it would be worth it in the end. "Tell me Lilitu, what about the Lucifers attracted you?" Memphis spoke again, her vocals weaving themselves through Lilitu's auds as the Alphess smiled, a broken grin was all Lilitu had to offer in return. And though she supposed it to not be enough, she gave Memphis one anyway. "Why did I come? I came because...because I knew it was the only place that was not pure evil that would accept me, demons and all. I came because it seemed right, because of the spontaneous decision that I made. Some may have called it foolish, but I know I did the right thing by not letting myself be influenced by the whispers that tread along the winds here upon Traum, trying to push one wolf towards a certain pack, just because they look the part, or walk the walk. Of course...it does not mean they talk the talk, but in any case, that is irrelevant. I came because it felt like the right thing to do, and because it seemed like such a large change from my family home, and separation from that was what I needed. Still need, really." She had never opened up to a wolf this much before, and the emotions that came pouring out with her explanation were too complex for even herself to understand. She felt so many things that made her insides twist and turn and knot themselves up so complexly that she doubted her ability to ever get them undone again. She let out a sigh and looked away, closing her eyes momentarily to clear her mind and her face before she turned to look back at Memphis, but her mask was still faulty for eyes as intelligent as her lady's. Or so she thought, seeing what lay beyond in the deep crevasses of Memphis's own optics. ooc- Kay that is actually what I needed...a post like this I mean. Sorry that took so long.

[¡§LUNAR✮OASIS¡§&#]

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[atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/243s46d.png] A wolfen eyebrow lifted as it seemed Lilitu seemed some what distracted. It wasn't offending to Memphis really. In fact Memphis, tried to keep track of what may cause distractions, or if there was another wolf around right then. She had the urge to seek out the members recently. Check they were in they're place, check they were ready for this war that was right around the corner. Asking why the Lucifer's had seemed interesting to Lilitu was a bland question. Most wolves wanted refuge, and even with their killing blood lust tainted minds, they wanted a family. That was the Lucifer's, that was what made it so intriguing and amazing. While Memphis expected the usual when it came to asking such a question, she was willing to get personal with the others. "Why did I come? I came because...because I knew it was the only place that was not pure evil that would accept me, demons and all. I came because it seemed right, because of the spontaneous decision that I made. Some may have called it foolish, but I know I did the right thing by not letting myself be influenced by the whispers that tread along the winds here upon Traum, trying to push one wolf toward a certain pack, just because they look the part, or walk the walk. Of course...it does not mean they talk the talk, but in any case, that is irrelevant. I came because it felt like the right thing to do, and because it seemed like such a large change from my family home, and separation from that was what I needed. Still need, really." Passionate and deep words resided with a confused tone from Lilitu. Memphis smiled, thinking of Naomi. Whom was the kindest of hearts, but risked living here to be with Arden. While she had just born to healthy Vory pups. The pack was in a good reign, even the sight of the new pups could calm a Lucifer. But it was still a risk, with double sided wolves living within the pack lands. "I don't see it as foolish, my dear Lilitu. When a wolf joins the Lucifer's, they must have courage. As most claim to be ruthless murders, why do you think they join? As you mentioned, it was a change. They long for acceptance, that is why some of us are as we are. And that I find takes courage to physically admit that, don't you agree?" Words like silk, her eyes often looked up to the skies. Seeing the grey winter skies same as always. It would never both her. It gave the most nostalgic feeling that raged through her veins with pleasure. What used to be bitting into flesh, to feel that vein's precious crimson flow into her mouth as she lathered that up as if it was the only pleasure. Memphis felt herself twitch. A harsh muscle movement within her gut and over her face expression. Honestly, she felt embarrassed just then. Cursing herself for letting such a clear memory flow within her mind and take the slightest control. Her chest raised and retracted quickly, avoiding eye contact with Lilitu. Some things couldn't be let go of. "Ever fought in a war Lilitu?" Memphis spoke, trying to bring up something to cover herself. Still looking off into the distance. Where was Kirill? She pondered, suddenly wanting to be surrounded by her closest family. Unable to keep her thoughts clear, as flashing images of those whom she drained of life. Even Dragunov had emerged. More un-needed reactions. Your making a fool of yourself! Her mind yelled at her.

[❦Mufasa❦]

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[atrb=background,http://i55.tinypic.com/ta6n2g.png] Yes, she was distracted, that much was impossible to deny. But she had her reasons. she did not know if she was wiling to share them with Memphis just yet, but in time she would see if she could trust her Alphess in that way. She assumed she could, but assumptions often led to mistakes, and a mistake was something she could not afford to make right now. That is, if she valued the bits of sanity that she still managed to cling to. She nodded, looking away, as if lost in thought. Having a conversation with herself, perhaps. It was hard to tell. Maybe she was just lost in the between worlds of her past, and of her present. It happened often, and it was difficult to control. Thankfully, Memphis did not seem to be bothered by how distracted she was. It was a good thing, for she knew just how ruthless a she-wolf could and would be when angered. Being one, and hearing stories about the she-wolves on Traum made her be especially careful with where she tread when dealing with one of them. She tried to force herself to take slower breaths, but she knew it was all in vain. Calming herself was not an option she could take at the moment. She wanted to, but she could not. The difficulty of keeping her rage suppressed for so long had finally overwhelmed her and she had no willpower left to keep it down. She just hoped that she would not do anything rash. ”I don’t see it as foolish, my dear Lilitu. When a wolf joins the Lucifer’s, they must have courage. As most claim to be ruthless murderers, why do you think they join? As you mentioned, it was a change. They long for acceptance, that is why some of us are as we are. And that I find takes courage to physically admit that, don’t you agree?” She let out a small nod and a noise of agreement. ”Yes, m’lady. Courage is a necessity these days it seems. It seems that no wolf is able to cower beneath the sheltered roof of a den for fear of their pack losing to the tidal wave of force that comes at them so often. Sometimes, the wave is smaller...but it still has that much of an impact. It can still destroy...” She trailed off, lost in her own thoughts and memories once again. Then, she remembered her company. With a quick shake of her head, she looked sheepishly over at the Alphess, and murmured, ”Forgive me, my lady. My memories it seems have waged their own war against my mind, and the tide is a bit hard to control at times.” She furrowed her brow and asked herself what was with all of these references to water? The analogies? It was unlike her. She hardly ever spoke in such a strange tone. But it seemed to put her mind, and the waves of thought that were slamming against the confines of its walls, at ease for the time being. She could tell that Memphis, too, was being taken hostage by her own mind. Difficult to say what she was thinking of, but the distant expression upon her face and the reactions and emotions that flitted past in her eyes and on her face itself, gave it away. But she mentioned it not. Memphis seemed to have a hard time dealing with the fact that she was letting slip the reins that held fast the memories of her past. Lilitu herself knew how that felt. It was hell to know that you could not control your own mind, when in reality, it should be the one thing that you were able to control. Memphis’ breathing seemed to increase, and Lilitu could tell that she was purposely avoiding eye contact with her, but it mattered not. She would let Memphis take care of her battles on her own, they were not hers to fight. ”Ever fought in a war Lilitu?”’ The question surprised her, it was random, but she knew why it was being asked of her. She nodded and replied softly, ”I have fought, yes. Not one of my favourite pastimes...but I have fought.” She looked away again, trying hard to restrain the images of blood and wolves felled by her own claws and teeth.

[¡§LUNAR✮OASIS¡§&#]

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[atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/243s46d.png] The skies seemed to move quickly. Just like the days that were going by. The days would soon run out until that war breaks out. Next to the Cesaru gang battles, this would be one of this biggest wars out there. Last time it was between Renegade, the Warriors and the Gang. This time, every pack would be involved. Memphis would be there to watch the enemies fall. There would be a sick smile over her maw as she watches their lifeless bodies fall to the ground. Stare into their lifeless eyes as she mutters a chuckle of laughter and pride over victory. The enemies had no chance against the whole island. That had to be a definite. Everyone had no doubts in this war, everyone knew they'd end the madness and chaos over the island. But how long will it last? How long will it be until the next group rises to take over? To create chaos, to see others plead and cry for help just as even Memphis enjoyed to see. Yet she didn't long for such a thing, not anymore. In her past time it was like a drug. Listening to their last words, so precious and so important. Yet only Memphis would keep them to herself for her personal enjoyment. ”Yes, m’lady. Courage is a necessity these days it seems. It seems that no wolf is able to cower beneath the sheltered roof of a den for fear of their pack losing to the tidal wave of force that comes at them so often. Sometimes, the wave is smaller...but it still has that much of an impact. It can still destroy...” Memphis was still glancing toward the skies for moment. She muttered the words silently, only to herself. "your disgusting." Blinking a few times as Lilitu spoke once more, breaking her faded thoughts. The both of them were silently suffering within their own minds. Yet it was so foolish of her for allowing such a thing to happen to her in her Alphess ideals. Brown eyes reached Lilitu once again. Memphis smiled and nodded, glad she agreed. Although she'd hold nothing against her if she didn't agree. Everyone have their opinions and Memphis gladly respected that. Clenching her eyes for a moment, Memphis had glanced away once more. ”Forgive me, my lady. My memories it seems have waged their own war against my mind, and the tide is a bit hard to control at times.” Eyes widened, strict bold movement of her head toward Lilitu. A some what pitied look came over Memphis' features. She had a sudden serious expression over her maw. Taking a deep breath, she stepped a bit closer. Eyes focused hard on Lilitu. She had a crooked smile now, trying to ease her expression. For this was all too familiar. "Listen Lilitu." She cleared her throat, taking in her own advice. "I am with you, and the Lucifer's will always be by your side with every call. Yet I know sometimes even everything can't heal the simplest of things. I apologize for my improper behavior but these things are over looked and turn into what we're about to fight for...." Desperation was in her voice, as she looked into Lilitu's eyes. Moving back, turning her head. Her message was a bit unclear and far forward. She wasn't the one for advice or well with situations such as these. If it was a manipulative matter, she'd be high ranked. Yet she failed when it came to this within her Queen Alphess duties. Sad, but true. Memphis let her tall frame greet the ground in a relaxing sitting matter. As Lilitu responded she had fought in a war, Memphis flashed a concerned smile over her maw. Concern for Lilitu, and herself. It seemed all pack leaders were being grinded from the thoughts of war. ooc; i said the last part cause in the past few high rank wolf threads they all are going a bit crazy or depressed from the war ;P

[❦Mufasa❦]

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[atrb=background,http://i55.tinypic.com/ta6n2g.png] Lilitu shivered as a breeze from nowhere stirred the fur on her back, as she watched the Alphess slip into a mindset not too different from the one she had been taught those few years ago. She could tell that she was thinking of the coming war, and Lilitu knew that it was something that must happen. After all, if one does not think of it, then how could one have a plan if something were to go amiss? However, it did not appear that she was exactly thinking of battle strategies. In fact, it was very clear that she was thinking of something else…something darker within the category of warfare. Lilitu herself was sure they would win. She had to admit that the Order was a well-functioning, very stable pack, however, with two packs going against three of the largest packs on Traum. The three packs that started here, and the three packs that knew these lands and exactly how to fight on them, and how to win. Lilitu thought back to past battles that she had won…her old pack had never lost a war, battles, definitely, but never a war. Her first one was probably the worst. Afterwards, she was empty and numb for days, she had relished in the fight during the battle, but as she thought back more and more, she realized that the pack coming after them had been so desperate, that she had been killing mere pups. Pups. As those memories came back to her now, she shuddered with guilt. Killing wolves that were hardly yearlings…in fact, they had wiped their entire pack out. They were gone now. Bringing herself back to the present, she could tell Memphis was still ridiculously angry with herself, for letting herself slide back into the past, but no, Lilitu felt there was nothing to be angry about. Being about her in a time like this was making it easy to slip back into one’s own dark past. She blamed Memphis not, for every wolf needs to let go and let themselves be weak every now and again. After all, if you are able to show weakness in the presence of others when the time is right…you are a very strong wolf indeed. The pity flashed across Memphis’ face like bullets from a gun, it was gone as fast as it had came, but it was not fast enough for Lilitu to miss it. She hated having others pity her, which is why she bottled it all up, why there was caked and dried blood on her foreleg, and her claws were turned a rusty red-black colour as the blood dried and began to flake. She would clean them later. ”Listen, Lilitu. I am with you, and the Lucifer’s will always be by your side with every call. Yet I know sometimes even everything can’t heal the simplest of things. I apologize for my improper behavior but these things are over looked and turn into what we’re about to fight for…” The desperation in her voice was so obvious that a look of sudden softness and understanding came over Lilitu’s face, and stayed. ”My Lady, thank you for your words. But I must say…there is no reason for you to be apologizing. Your behaviour is understandable, of course. We are on the verge of war, and things change when these times come upon packs. And if you are worried I would be upset, or perhaps even go so far as to be insulted…no. Not at all. You are a strong wolf, m’lady, and strong wolves not only know how to cover what they think and feel…but they know how to show it too. Or at least, that is what I think…and that is what I see in you.” She hoped she had not overstepped her place, knowing that some of what she had said was rather bold. And yet, she felt as though it had little effect…Memphis had an expression of sadness on her face, so instead, she went so far as to tentatively move her tail to rest it comfortingly on Memphis’ flank for a passing moment as she sat next to her, turned at a slight angle so as to see her still. She knew she was being very bold, and many Alphas or Alphesses would punish one wolf, even of her slightly higher rank, for doing such things, but she felt it was necessary in a time such as this, because even though Memphis had come here, and started to comfort her, sometimes, the favour must be returned in a faster manner than anticipated.

[¡§LUNAR✮OASIS¡§&#]

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[atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/243s46d.png] Little did both of the females realize, just how similar they both were. Both were bold, ruthless and had given themselves a rough past. Memphis hadn't a clue of Lilitu's past, other than the depressing war times. Which could really screw up just about anyone. Even as brilliant and as much promise as wolves hold, it seemed their minds were to weak for their own good. It was a lesson, Memphis was slowly beginning to learn. Only most old, wise wolves among Traum have begun to realize this. But sadly, it was true. Meanwhile, Memphis past held revenge and unnecessary murder. Wanting to avenge her brother, which never happened. While on this rampage, she had a set mind that everyone she crossed was the traider. Memphis single handedly murdered three small wolf tribes. The thoughts were scary, they were disgusting. Memphis tried not to remember those cold silent nights when she sneeked into the rogue groups. One by one, they'd wake up to find her chesire smile hovering above them, lips of poison. Some how, within those months her mind taught itself that the wolves were corrupted and needed to be dealt with. ”My Lady, thank you for your words. But I must say…there is no reason for you to be apologizing. Your behaviour is understandable, of course. We are on the verge of war, and things change when these times come upon packs. And if you are worried I would be upset, or perhaps even go so far as to be insulted…no. Not at all. You are a strong wolf, m’lady, and strong wolves not only know how to cover what they think and feel…but they know how to show it too. Or at least, that is what I think…and that is what I see in you.” Memphis looked away from her paws, eyes hesitant as Lilitu calmed her dark thoughts. Despite all the rash and horrid thoughts both Memphis and Lilitu held, they were here, together in a way temporally healing each other. Or so Memphis felt this way. The company of others seemed vital to Memphis. As if it was the only way for her to keep her dignity and stay under control. "Thank you, Lilitu. You are right, realization is often key. I, myself, to be honest has never been in a war. My fighting skills are fair, but being in the midst of so much death and chaos will be a first and a test for me. While these recent months, the Lucifer's have grown quiet. The whole island has grown quiet, too quiet..." Memphis tried twisting the growing frown into a smirk, but it failed. "I also have not seen my son in a long time. Or Kirill for that matter. Yet I've felt it's vital I stay among the pack lands, ready for the war call. Even though half of me wishes to seek out them both." She sighed and expressed a small laugh. "Sorry again, for I am showing quite the weak mindedness to you. Yet within their conversation Lilitu had sat closer to Memphis. In a comforting way. Thinking about it, the pack was hardly as close as it used to be. With the chaos of war about to break and so many outsiders finding their way into Traum, it was a sad though. Memphis smiled. She gestured her approval and kinder thoughts emerging in her head. "I know Kirill wished to move the pack to some place new after the war. I'm looking forward to it, really. After the war, who knows what will come of this island. But Kirill plans to take new land at the prime time." She smirked trying to recall their thoughts and think forward. Memphis then wished the War would just happen, to get it over with. So then the pack could rejoice.